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N.A.M.E. Platform™ · The naming framework

The A.B.U.S.E. Awareness Grid.

N.E.O. Exercise — Name It. Expose It. Overcome It.

I built this grid the day I realized I had blacked out every square on someone else's BINGO card — and no one had ever handed me the language for any of it. What you refuse to name will continue to define you.

This is the first half of the framework: a map of what happened, what it did inside you, and where it leads if left unnamed. Circle what you've lived. You are not alone in any single square.

— Dr. DeAnna Lynn Nix, Founder of N.A.M.E.
A
B
U
S
E
Molestation
Parental Neglect
Domestic Violence
Sexual Trauma
Abandonment
Depression
Anxiety
Fear of People · Failure · Death · Rejection
Low Self-Esteem
Shame · Poor Parenting · Bad Choices
Insomnia (Nightmares)
Imposter Syndrome
The Core
A.B.U.S.E.
Physical · Emotional
Mental · Verbal
Betrayal
Manipulation
Poverty
Employment Termination
Bankruptcy
Divorce
Food Insecurity
Hopelessness
Psychotic Breakdowns
Homelessness
Suicidal Ideation
Abortion
⁂
How to use this grid

Circle every item you have experienced. Draw lines between items that feel connected. Notice how many paths lead back to the center. When you can name it, you can begin to deal with it.

Reading the grid

Five rows. One story.

Every row in the A.B.U.S.E. grid moves further from the trigger and deeper into its consequences. Read it top-to-bottom and you'll see the shape of unaddressed trauma.

i.
Root Experiences
What happened to you. The trigger experiences that started the pattern.
ii.
Internal Responses
What it did inside you. The emotional residue you carry forward.
iii.
The Core
The center from which everything flows — physical, emotional, mental, verbal abuse.
iv.
Life Consequences
What it produced in your life. The downstream cost trauma extracts.
v.
Crisis Points
Where it can lead if unaddressed. The places naming the wound interrupts.
Definitions

In the language of lived experience, not clinical diagnosis.

There is a name to every issue. Tap any row below to read what each word means in the context of this framework. Naming is the first step to no longer paying for it.

› Root experiences Row I · What happened to you
  • Molestation
    Someone violated your body and your trust, often before you had the language to name it.
  • Parental Neglect
    Growing up without the care or protection every child deserves.
  • Domestic Violence
    Living under someone who used fear, threats, or force to control your home.
  • Sexual Trauma
    The wound left by sexual violation — it reshapes how you see yourself and the world.
  • Abandonment
    Being left by someone who was supposed to stay. It taught you that love is temporary.
› Internal responses Row II · What it did inside you
  • Depression
    A heaviness beyond sadness — something inside you went quiet, and you cannot reach it.
  • Anxiety
    A constant state of waiting for the next bad thing. Your body never unlearned the guard.
  • Fear
    Deep dread — of people, failure, death, rejection — that shapes every decision you make.
  • Low Self-Esteem
    The belief that you are less than — a message spoken over you until you believed it.
  • Shame
    The conviction that you are not just hurt but broken. Poor parenting and bad choices became your identity.
› The core Row III · The center
  • A.B.U.S.E.
    Physical, emotional, mental, verbal — the center of this grid and the root of everything on it.
  • Insomnia & Nightmares
    No rest at night because your mind replays what it could not process during the day.
  • Imposter Syndrome
    The feeling you do not belong and your accomplishments are not real. Abuse said you were never enough.
  • Betrayal
    The person who should have protected you became the source of harm. It breaks deeper than trust.
  • Manipulation
    Controlled through guilt, confusion, or lies until you could not trust your own reality.
› Life consequences Row IV · What it produced
  • Poverty
    Abuse disrupted your stability — and the world judged the outcome without knowing the cause.
  • Employment Termination
    Losing a job because trauma showed up as absences, conflict, or an abuser interfering.
  • Bankruptcy
    Financial collapse from economic abuse, survival spending, or the cost of escaping danger.
  • Divorce
    The end of a marriage — to escape abuse, or because its patterns followed you.
  • Food Insecurity
    Not knowing where your next meal comes from — poverty, instability, or someone controlling what you ate.
› Crisis points Row V · Where it can lead
  • Hopelessness
    The belief that nothing will change and the pain is permanent. Where the deepest crises begin.
  • Psychotic Breakdowns
    When the mind can no longer hold the weight of unaddressed trauma and loses contact with the present.
  • Homelessness
    Loss of a stable home — often the final result of poverty, family breakdown, and failed systems.
  • Suicidal Ideation
    Thoughts of ending your life because the pain says there is no other way. There is. You are reading this.
  • Abortion
    A decision that may follow sexual abuse or crisis — carrying its own weight of grief.
The other half of the framework

Naming what hurt you is one half. What keeps your light on is the other.

Have you read the L.I.G.H.T. Grid? It's the answer card to A.B.U.S.E. — the practices, people, and rhythms that hold you up while you do the work of naming. You need both.

Read the L.I.G.H.T. Grid →
© 2026 Dr. DeAnna Lynn Nix · Not At My Expense™ is a trademark of the N.A.M.E. Platform. Speaking inquiries: name@deannaspeak.com